Fai†hfully Preparing my Fields for the Rain

:: Live to die? ::

Is life so cruel we have to hide from it...?

Everybody has problems, some face them, some run from them, some hide from them...
It's been some time since i came out to face these problems... some big some small... but still are problems... It's the same as white lies, big lies, they're still lies... Big sin, small sin are still sins that God despises and hates.

How have i been hiding... At first it was a game of pool that led to months of it, everyday after school even during exams... then it was maple story for awhile switching to gunbound then to intensive TV watching and music listening... eventually i reach a new game called DotA which also led to addiction for a few months...

Why have i been hiding... too many problems... let's list them out...
Character: gone down the drain... never bothers about people anymore... appear offline most of the time in msn just because i don't want to talk... or maybe i lost my most appealling trait, cockiness crapping that BRINGS laughter...
Life: a mess, so is my room... about 2mm of dust visible...
Spiritual life: terrible! like never read bible for years liddat... but communication with God never stopped, even when playing game... wanted to make a website for God to help others but until now haven't completed.
Worship: no good! feels like i'm leading a shity lifestyle.
Fellowship: ok lah, considering going out to play DotA i get to know more of the people in church.
Discipleship: have i been christ-like? not up to me to say.
Ministry: Dance? no good... not been practicing for rather long.
Evangelism: is as bad as ever!!
Love: is patient, so i shall continue to perservere and wait for the right time... but when is the right time? who decides that time is right? what am i going to do when the time is right? how do i know if it is right time? where will i be after the time comes?
Friends: are suppose to be there when you need them right? but not always... Some people, you go into their life and they think you're the only good person on the face of the earth, throws you all their problem and expects you to have a solution... this is absurb!
Work: is terribly hard, especially when you open your wallet and realise that your mom came into your room yesterday when you were playing game, she opens the drawer takes out your wallet, grabs some cash and says "ahfu! i borrow money from you hor!"
Business: is good and getting better! too bad i'm not a part of it... yet...
Spiritual family: is good... some misunderstanding... actually considered alot... girl problem... haiz... sianz...
Family: is the only thing i have now... my whole family said my hair is nice!! =)

k, the next thing is steps taken to solve these problems...

Had a Vision
on Monday, October 10, 2005, 5:48 PM