Fai†hfully Preparing my Fields for the Rain

:: My first weekend out ::

Saturday was rather quick... it just ended in a blink of an eye... I spend some time on the comp, had lunch with yt n jh at teppanyaki for lunch, went to cell and felt wierd listening to all the girls scream n laugh... brings back memories... T_T

it seems like yt grown too fast, it seems like he cannot fit in... I'm half half though, a part of me is trying to fit in to the group but another part of me is telling me to grow up!

Evening I had 2 dinner, 2 roti prata at sempang, n a ribeye steak at Jack's Place. I'm sooo full... n broke...

At Jack's place I ate with yt, ian, paul and huishan... first time I went Jack's Place and probably the last time... everything there is sooo "cheap"
Long time never see huishan le, I wanted to say she... err... became more 'feng man' but instead I got the opportunity to say something more indirect when she said her steak was flabby or something, den I told her "You know they say you are what you eat" den I continued by saying how muscular, dark and tender my steak was... =X

Sunday came and went even faster, first I woke up, den I went to church, service was good, it talked about the "Saul" of our life and the "Jonathan" of our life and if we have been a "Jonathan" to others giving encouragement for others to grow... I immediately felt all the "Sauls" in my memories coming back to me at once... T_T

K, nvm bout tt... I'm a man already! well.. a man in training at least...

Alright now, no more time left, i gtg liao... Overall, I give my weekend a "Great!" cos of all the compliments of saying how muscular I've become! I'm a few steps closer to one of my new years' target! woo! =D

Had a Vision
on Sunday, September 30, 2007, 5:19 PM

:: First book out! ::

Yay! the long awaited day called book out day!

This is when we are freed from this wierd prison-like place where everyone behaves like a robot, taking orders to move, walking step in step, running step in step, eating the same food and drinks everyday, sleeping at the same time and waking at the same time...

When I reach home, there was no one at first, it suddenly felt like I woke up from a long bad dream especially after I bath n sit in front of my comp... Just that I have this urge to exercise...

I reached home ard 4.30pm n I slept at 9pm, woke up at 8am! Ahhh... finally, undisturbed sleep... everyday I only got 5-6hrs of sleep n now I have 11hrs! woo!

I have a very wierd feeling that I'm going to fall into this long bad dream again very soon...

Had a Vision
on Saturday, September 29, 2007, 10:48 AM

:: First day in NS ::

ok, you all must be wondering why I can post my entry about NS when I should be in NS now right?

Well, it's a long story so I'll just post about what I did that day first...

At first, I had breakfast with my family and cell, ly, zl, ahgu and yujie came to send me off, so nice of them isn't it... Then they send me off until the interchange where I get to take the feeder bus with my mom and mei to the ferry and all the way to tekong island... from there we were seperated liao, my family went to look at the clothes we're wearing and all and visted the bunks and all...

While I had to do some adminstrative stuff, they took my IC den issued me a new green IC and a sling bag very nice de but I don't like my card, I look funny, serious but funny, it was the one I took during my medical checkup which was like super long ago. Anyway, most of the time we waited to be called until everyone got the new id n sling bag, we went to another area and our sergeant major came to tell us what to do later during the pledge of allegiance. From there we had to start shouting "YES SERGEANT MAJOR!" liao... so not use to it la... tell us we had to stand at attention and all and cannot move blah blah blah... Then after that he left us for a toilet break and to watch this video... my view was pretty much blocked by a pillar so I can only see abit...

After the video, we went in this auditorium-like place and we sat in the center, our parents came in awhile later and they sat the side of the audi. Then when everyone was here someone gave a speech and we watch the video we just watched... after the video, our "principal" gave a speech and briefly explained that about how the training is progressively done and every safety precaution taken and all blah blah blah... ask if there's any question then finish. We carried on with the pledge of allegiance, I, IC number, Full name, pledge that blah blah blah, blah blah blah...

Then after that, the recruits went outside to wait for our parents to go eat lunch together, during the speech, the "principal" said that the food the parents will eat is the food we all will be eating, so what we had was rice, whipped potato, a chicken thigh, red beans, broccoli, an orange, and a cup of orange juice. Then after lunch, we send our parents to the entrance and say bye bye.

And this is where it all begins... we were brought to the track field, they called our names, we say "YES SIR!" take our things and line up in 2 rows... this was where we are spilt into our different sections (bunks). From here we started marching our way to our company (our block), not that we really marched cos most of us dunno how yet. We gathered in a common area which was also the pull up area which was in between company F and E... we were taught how to "fall in" den after that he explained about the company line and all, and we were brought into our bunks were we left our things and went to get our barang barang in another place. We had to bring our new id cards along to scan. There was a person who scanned and another who told us a 4 digit id number which we wrote down, den we walk to the next table where we find our number in the file and sign. den we walk to another shed to get our barang barang with the number and name. It's freakin heavy la! good thing the truffle bag had wheels so can drag it along... After everything get liao, we went to another place to check if all our stuffs are inside with the right size, den we went back to our bunk...

The training started here... where we had to move all our freakin heavy barang barang to the 4th floor using the stairs cos we not allowed to use the lift. Here we are allocated our bed number and where we tried out our clothes can wear anot even the swimming trunk... >.<

After that is dinner liao, this time we also must bring our id to scan den can eat, no need bring bag just the card enough and $2 for the haircut later. This time we had rice, cabbage, 3 lemon sauce chicken drumsticks, 2 fishcake, a ya pear (li) and a cup of cold bandung... It was late liao... We started marching to get our haircut... haiz... byebye hair... Actually it wasn't so bad cos I cut before, after my haircut I saw zhijin cut his hair but he didn't see me. After haircut we go back our company and prepare for our water parade where we have to drink half a bottle of water seh... waliew, after dinner somemore... Thank God I didn't finish my dinner. I never finish cos they give alot of rice so cannot finish loh... I did clear the rest of the food though, the chicken was nice.

Then finally comes the RO where we get tmr's event and we are "free!" to walk around n feel "slack" where smokers get their smoking break, etc. This was where I kind of reported sick to my sergeant cos i asked where the sickbay was then he say I want to report sick ah? n i say ya... I told him my right ear is block, n i have a flu... he told me to look for the COS, i waited for some time b4 i was attended, he den made me sign out and brought me to the medical center which was a few blocks away, I went in to see the OM where he checked me and decided to put me on "att C" which means I must go home! So later he gave me my medicine and a letter that writes I'm under 2 days attend C, den I walk back to my company and gave the letter to my COS where he gave the OC, but the OC gave a command that I be send to the sickbay to sleep, so I went up pack my things and the COS accompany me to the medical center again where he left me BUT there the OM insisted I stick to the att C and told me to go back tell my COS to tell the OC and if he insisted, tell the OC to call the OM, so I walk all the way back to the company again to tell the COS about what happen, waited for quite awhile and decided to send me home... =_=

So I climb up to the 4th floor again into my bunk where I saw my bunk mate in their mosquito nets sleeping soon, this was were they kanna scold by the sergeant major about those who didn't put on their mosquito net, so anyway I pack my stuffs, change back to civillian clothes, called my parent to fetch me but they ask me take cab, so here sergeant David came and fetch me home... first they let me ride on this jeep to an office where I met PC1, I was talking to another PC i think is PC2 also known as sergeant David, he's rather nice and he shared with me that he also went home on his enlistment day cos he had chicken pox... he say he also met alot of ppl on his first day because of that and told me not to worry. He explained some of the system and how/what to do as we were on the jeep, then on the ferry, then in the OC's car, then all the way to my doorstep! -_-"

So there, my first day in NS... a rather comprehensive 1... now if anyone going army soon, you can read this entry to be better prepared.

btw, I used alot of abbreviation for the names, cos that's what they keep calling out... I asked what a few are called but still not very sure cos got alot...

COS - a sergeant on duty that day in charge of signing in and out I think
OM - Medical Officer
OC - Company Officer
PC - i think is Platoon Section leader or Platoon Officer
REC - Recruit
Coy - Company

Had a Vision
on Sunday, September 16, 2007, 10:02 AM

:: NS here I come... ::

this is it...

my last entry before I go in...

I feel like it's just another day...

and wanna know what i've done for the final week

you really wanna know?

really really wanna know...

k, i'll say...

but you have to promise you won't be angry at me

say you promise... else don't scroll down...

>.<
>.< >.<
>.< >.< >.<
>.< >.<
>.<
>.<
>.< >.<
>.< >.< >.<
>.< >.<
>.<
>.<
>.< >.<
>.< >.< >.<
>.< >.<
>.<

Tadah!

Had a Vision
on Friday, September 14, 2007, 10:39 PM

:: Last words? ::

Question: So you got anything you wan to say to us?

Answer: Of Course! *stands up and looks at everyone's faces* You all ah... better work on the dance, Wenyan will be teaching, and dun slack hor... must do ur crunches properly! 1,2,3,4... 2,2,3,4... 3,2,3,4... Build those abs until can land an airplane!! Must do stretching also hor... wait kanna DOMS... *does some funny actions*

Also, listen to Janet jie, wait she scold u all... Listen to Jiayi also... and also listen to Iris... and err.. thx for the food... though I was expecting more but this will do just fine...

Question: So what do you think will be your biggest challenge there?

Ans: Well, other than losing my hair... I think I'm pretty scared of the training there since I was in NCC b4 and sadly to say there was once I fainted during a parade... Then marching... ugh... the push-ups... oww... the smell... yucks... I think the worst part is the process of me becoming a "man" means i'm gonna have more responsibilities... The hardest part will probably be stepping out of the house on saturday knowing that i'm going to wake up the next day in another world...

Question: So what is the biggest thing you'll miss?

Ans: wow... alot... though it's just for 2 weeks I won't see you guys... I'll miss my home, my room, especially my computer and my bed... I'll miss my family,
my dad giving money to me for no reason...
my mom's cooking, tea, scared for no reason over the most not impt thing and not caring about the impt things...
my jie's "Oie!" "Bu yao copy wo la" and the blah blah blah talking
my mei's "Kor kor da bian mei you la shui..." "I tell you so many times to close the door and light rite" and all teh wierd stuff she does like talking to herself...

I'll miss all my brothers...
Jiahui's complaining about other ppl, his noob questions and all the *** words that he keep using for all his sentences... I'm better prepared to enter NS cos of him...
Zhijin's *look at me and smack his own butt* and all his "Da Bian..."
Yt's *shooting powers around me thinking I'll fall down like a golem behaviour*
Ly's intectual talks as well as bus rides home... sometimes he just falls asleep...
Song De's *touch my chest for no reason* sometimes he touch my butt... makes my hair stand.
Chek's laughter and his carefree attitude...
Jonnie's way of talking so funny... like have to finish the sentence in 1 sec...
Keith's unpredictable mood swings...
Jin Hao's talking about something sometimes I don't really know what he's talking about...
Pastor's smile and laughter
Paul and Wei Chong's nose... cos that's what i always see at eye level
ZhiHao's way of flirting with girls...
Yi Hong's 'out of this world' point of view...
and all those other guys who has bad breathe... I find it very hard to listen to them pray for me in my face... =X

I'll miss the gals alot too... I'm gonna miss...
Yujie's bimbotic style... somehow I like girls like that... I tend to do the same to them back...
Yuhan's hair! so cool... if she's a guy, n i'm a girl I would behave very bimbotic around her...
Yuxuan... i think i like her hair also... i mean i'll miss her hair... or maybe not... =X
YuRou's "Lu!" *giggles* "Lu!" "wei she me hong mei you lai?"
ZL's "Ok, jing tian wo men de jing wen shi..."
Wenyan's "AHHhhh!!" *laughs* "AHHHhhh!!" *giggles* "AHHHhh!!" *lol*
Jiayi's for no reason get angry tone and her 'I am innocent!!' look... we know ur innocent, we just wan to play with you... always blur blur de...
Jiahui's "Jump! Jump! I wan Jump!" *puts her hands out in front of me*
Keli's out of nowhere *giggle* and out of nowhere *laugh*
Qiqin's laugh until she look like she choking... *den covers the mouth*
Sun Mei's speed... so different when she plays badminton... n during other times...
Iris's speed also... lol... i'll miss seeing her bullying jy...
Xiner's silence... and her very welcoming big white smile...
HuiWen's talking alot but everybody not listening to her scene
St's cold jokes and happy go lucky jumping around like a bunny style...
Zt's peeking at me... and her *taps my shoulder* "Eh! mei you shi... byebye!"
Xt's silence... and her blur blur innocent innocent look
Michelle's "eh you know the dance ah... i dunno leh"
AiQing's whisper "I tell you ah..."
Feli's "Mmmmm..." "Iris Jie!" *pinching and slapping other people's arms*
Valen's so sweet blush... and her hair... cos that's what i see first... at eye level...
Janet's mood swings... extreme mood swings... =X
Jasmyn's "Mei you!!" and her optimisim in life...
I'm already missing Faith's "Huhhhhh...."
I'll also miss all the aunties who knew my name and served me lunch and breakfast de... So sry I dunno u all...

K, so who did I miss? *looks around the table and see everyone sleeping le* Aiya... see I shouldn't have talked... *walks away angrily*

*Yt still jumping around shooting powers at me and saying "Die!" and snaps his fingers when someone walks pass den look at me and laugh*

Had a Vision
on Sunday, September 09, 2007, 3:22 PM

:: Love advise ::

I had this wierd dream of everyone giving me tips on relationship... And there was this one person that I could remember most clearly... she said, "You have to treat her like she's in heaven."

o_O

How would I know what people are treated like in heaven... I tot everyone will be worshiping God in various ways 24/7...

Or maybe...

Dear God, please make me Christ-like... Cleanse me Lord... Holy Spirit, teach me, guide me and constantly remind me of What Would Jesus Do? In Jesus Christ name I pray, amen.

Had a Vision
on Saturday, September 08, 2007, 11:01 AM

:: Singlified ::

Single-fied... means to be made single... o_O

Sounds like a nicer way to put it...

Ok, God... something seems to have gone terribly wrong somewhere... and I'm not gonna blame anyone cos I'm partialy part of the problem... let's just start over, k? I'm gonna pray for a wife but first I'll help her pray for a husband...

Dear God, I pray for Samantha's future, I pray that you'd prepare for her a partner that was completely made for her, her soulmate or maybe more. I pray that he is a strong believer, a man of integrity who loves you and understands you, who read your words daily and do them as well. I pray that he can and will give her all the support that she needs, all the love, care, concern, and understanding that she needs. I pray that he would enjoy sports like basketball, soccer, volleyball, and likes to watch shows like spongebob and Friends. I also pray that he is tall, dark, handsome, built with strong arms and biceps, courageous, gentle, patient, faithful and kind, I also pray that he is smart enough to be in the same school as her and probably would go to the same workplace as her, he must live in Toa Payoh also, owns a car and most probably getting a boat and must like going fishing in the open sea as well. I also pray that he has a dream of having a house by the sea, oh ya, and he must be interested in guitar, drums, singing, and has a very own band! Oh! and one mroe thing, he shouldn't have any problems getting along with her parents and likewise has parents that get along well with anyone also... k, that should be all... Simple right? Not really much to ask from an Almighty God, a God of Love, mercy and grace... God, I learnt that you are a God who gives opportunity and so I pray that you would create an ooportunity for these 2 souls to meet, become friends, and eventually lovers... I pray that you would prepare their hearts and send them a message when the opportunity arise. I pray you would send down even more angels to protect the angel carrying the message that is being sent down to them... Lord, I pray sincerely that you'd cleanse them at that moment so that they can see the angel. Finally, I pray for your Holy Spirit to guide them on their way up to your kingdom, and on the way up, let thier lives be a living testimony, glorifying your Name Lord! In Jesus Christ name I pray, amen!

now... my prayer...
Dear God, I believe you are a God who gives opportunities for us to learn, who us to love. So I pray that you would give me oppotunity to become a better person, who can change myself to suit a partner that you had prepare for me since the beginning of time. Mould me to become a man who understands you, who loves you and listens to your every command. I pray you would give me the opportunity meet upon this person you have prepared for me, who is also a woman of God, who loves you, understands you and listens to your every command. That is all I am asking for God... She doesn't have to be Singapore's Top model or a rich tycoon's only daughter, I believe you would give me what you think is best for me for I know that your best is really the best I can ever ask for. Let our lives too, be a living testimony to you God. In Jesus Christ name I pray, amen.

Had a Vision
on , 10:13 AM

:: Talents used on a Rubik's cube, worth it? ::

My aunt just came back from hong kong today and we went esplanade cos mom never see b4... den we went jumbo cafe to eat at clark quey... we had this baby squid which was simply nice la! crispy crispy de... it was nice until i realise i was eating "baby" squids... i learn a new word... called calamansi... i only knew the chinese name of this fruit... who knew it was sour!

ok... why do i keep getting off track the title...

k, When i was going out, i told myself that there must be a learning point today when i go out and i realise that if i'm a sim character, i'm actually the one with the aspiration of knowledge!

k, anyway... I saw this 2 guys on the train playing with this Rubik's cube, one guy was so good he could almost close his eyes and solve it in like 1min! So he was teaching the other guy how he did it and actually explained theory to him loh... Now this guy is really what I called talented...

In my mind, I thought... so what if you can solve a Rubik's cube... I admire a skill like that and very impressed by it but what good does it has on others? or even himself? maybe he figured out in a day, maybe he took many years to master it... in the end what did he gain? a few stare, a big applause, some attention, some "WOW!" "Wah!!!"

Then I imagine him at judgement day... God ask him, "So why do you think I should let you in"
And the guy takes out a blindfold and a Rubik's cube and starts to 'entertain' God... how funny the scene would be...

until my turn is up... how will I answer to Him?

Had a Vision
on , 12:57 AM

:: The Cross-over ::

I just spend 50k A-cash... I can't believe it...

Now I have to write a logical reason for myself for "wasting that money"

On my way there, in the bus... I was thinking... Then I saw this family, with 3 kids... you know what I saw... one of them wore a billabong shorts, and another 1 holding a palmtop with the other hand pressing dunno what while the last kid watches...

My logic tells me... they are wasting money...

the question is Why?

How can people spend so much on something God sees as dust... Then again, isn't everything else we spend on seen as dust? So does it matter what we spend on...

I feel that it's still our choice... and for me...

I have chosen to buy cheap $5 dollar clothes, while spending alot on things unseen? Virtual world is considered unseen rite?

oops! i just realise the title doesn't link... I wanted to talk about how i'm using freedom of an adult as a little child would... cos I left 1 week of freedom left, b4 i lose my status of being a boy...

Had a Vision
on Friday, September 07, 2007, 1:37 PM

:: Evans Almighty ::

It's a... very meaningful movie...

Especially the part where God visits Jon (Evans wife) in the shop shortly after she left him alone to work on the ark.

Morgan Freeman as God voices this sentiment

Let me ask you something. If someone prays for patience, you think God gives them patience? Or does he give them the opportunity to be patient? If he prayed for courage, does God give him courage, or does he give him opportunities to be courageous? If someone prayed for the family to be closer, do you think God zaps them with warm fuzzy feelings, or does he give them opportunities to love each other?

Oh ya, there was this other part when Evan was building the Ark, a reporter ask him, "How do you know that God chose you?"
He replied, "God chose all of us."

really interesting movie... worth watching... 3.7/5 stars i would give

Had a Vision
on , 1:11 AM

:: High Avoid ::

Wow! I've got so much to say!

I wanted to post this some time ago but I've been hiding...

I wanted to apologise for what I'm going to do... which is hiding in maple...

I'm a thief in maple... a rogue, a bandit and now Chief bandit but I portray myself as a ninja, a shinobi, someone who is highly skilled in the art of stealth. I was once a Knight though... Noble, charismatic, diplomatic and all the good stuff...

But now...
I'm a Shinobi, and the best thing I'm good at is hiding...
I no longer wear a heavy armor and carry a big sword and shield to defend cos there's no longer anyone to defend, nobody needs a Knight in the modern society... I now wear camo clothes and a mask to cover my face...
I no longer face fear in the eye, I go around them and avoid them as much as I can... climbing up walls, kill from behind and run or just throw shurikens at a distance then finally leaves by throwing smoke bombs when caught.
I no longer fight battles on the battlefield... I now avoid fighting as much as possible.

Ok, anyway... I just wanted to say Ninja's have high avoid... so do I... I'm avoiding everything that's coming to me now... I just want time alone...

Had a Vision
on , 12:47 AM

:: Sweet Friends ::

That day in church during sermon when Jiayi passed me a sweet, I got a flashback of me in secondary school then back to primary school of how I use to make new friends...

In secondary school, I don't know why but when you bring a packet of sweet and offer them to some1, and when they accept, you'll think they accept you as a friend, and when they don't, they don't accept you as a friend... but you'd try and try again with different types of sweet until that person finnaly accept your sweet. Then poof! They became Friends! o_O

During primary school, it was kinda different... I'm not really sure... cos I don't really had friends back den...

Don't even need to say Kindergarden...

ok... this is going pretty bad... so anyway, that's not what I wanted to discuss...

Are you a sweet friend?

Now that's the title I'm looking for!

A sweet friend makes friends by offering sweets! Many many different type of sweets!
A sweet friend says only sweet stuff! like roses red, violets blue, honey sweet but not as sweet as u blah blah blah...
A sweet friend does only sweet things! like remembering you birthday, prepare a huge party and make sures you are happy on that day or any other that he/she sees you...
A sweet friend knows the sweetest place to bring you when you are feeling down and glomy...

Now that's a sweet friend... too bad they don't exist anymore...

Had a Vision
on , 12:30 AM

:: I'm blogging because I need to... ::

I'm blogging cos i need to blog... especially after lying down in bed for 2 hrs turning n turning n unable to fall asleep cos I have so many things in my head swirling swirling...

So i'll just write down my thoughts in this thing called blog. Too bad it's open, people are reading this blog and they'll know what i'm thinking... but who cares! I always write down my thoughts and nobody cares!

It's my feelings that I never write down... maybe sometimes I write them down... It's the so called "weak" side of men... and the thing with people nowadays... they SUCK at encouraging people when someone else is down... well, at least tt's what I think cos everytime I'm down I have to keep it inside cos everytime I show, nobody knows what to do... they just stare...

But maybe they are like me? They know how to help but doesn't help cos they are scared... scared of what, I dunno... cos I'm still trying to figure out myself...

I need an answer God... I need a sign... I'm lost...

Right now I have a sea of emotions inside of me, many things I want to say to so many people, so many feelings I want to express to so many people... Happiness, sadness, sorrow, joy, anger, jealousy, pity, envy and many more...

God, I admit it... I'm the type of guy who wears a mask... This mask is a happy face mask, I wear it all the time, everywhere, infront of everyone. This mask is rather high tech... It helps me save everything I see, hear, or feel... Every single insult, bad word, gosip, every punch, kick, lies, every word of criticism, everything has been recorded down into my memory, sometimes they just blow up infront of me and it just hurts so much that I just want to die! But nobody can see this emense pain that I'm feeling... All because of this mask...

God, please help me remove this mask...

God, You're the only one I complain to... all the bad things that happens, when this person say what and what, when that person do so and so. I never take it out on them, cos I know it would hurt them. You told me to love them, didn't you?! So when they punch me, I let them punch somemore... When they curse me, I bless them somemore... When they hurt me, I also let them... Why am I so stupid???

Why can't I punch them back?
Why won't I say F*** you back?
Why do I keep the hurts in a bottle?

Everytime the bottle cracks and burst into tears, I somehow get a new one from dunno where! Then the process continues...

I hate going out... I hate going out with people... They drain the very life force out of me... maybe tt's why I keep staring at the computer, pressing the same buttons over and over again for unlimited hours despite knowing how the program works and that I'm just wasting my life away...

God, another thing I have to admit... I run when I face stress... I hide in maple... it's where nobody can find me... cos somehow I've gotten so close to the computer, that other than God, the computer is the only other "person" that I can really open up to...

ok, tt's all for now... my bottle is cracking...

Had a Vision
on Thursday, September 06, 2007, 11:47 PM