Name: GentleSquall
Age: Too old for you
DISC Personality: CSI/D
Practitioner/Realist/One Who is Steadfast
About Me: Just a guy.. whom God loves
Quote: The one who sows to please his sinful nature, from that nature will reap destruction;
the one who sows to please the Spirit, from the Spirit will reap eternal life. Let us not become weary in doing good,
for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.
Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all people,
especially to those who belong to the family of believers. Galatians 6:8-10
:: I just needed a direction ::
Do you know the story of Jonah?
He was called to go to Nineveh but he refused God and went another way but God sent a storm to stop him then used a great fish to swallow him and send him back.
I too was called, but I refused and God sent a storm at me... I felt like I was in the fish's stomach...
Have you ever wondered what Jonah felt during his stay in the fish stomach?
I think I had the same feeling...
I felt dark lonely, very very lonely loss of all hope restrained I didn't know where I was going I didn't know how long I was going to be inside I felt lost I felt homesick I felt lovesick I needed to see the light badly I slowly grow insane and depress as the minutes pass
Then today, God finally took me out of the fish!
I saw the light, it was so bright I couldn't open my eyes... but Ah Gu came to help, I told him my destination and he told me what was the direction to take and I continued walking to where I was suppose to go from the start...
Had a Vision on Sunday, March 30, 2008, 9:15 PM
:: Movie Marathon ::
My learnings...
Kick the bucket
All things must pass
'Tis better to have loved and lost Than never to have loved at all.
Absence makes the heart grow fonder
The course of true love never did run smooth
Get over it
So near yet so far
Know which way the wind blows
Coincidence is God's way of remaining anonymous
Had a Vision on , 1:30 AM
:: Dilemma! ::
I am deeply grieved...
Have you ever come across a point in life where you had to make a very difficult choice?
Have you ever come across a point in life where you had to choose which school to go to?
Have you ever come across a point in life who you want to have as you partner?
Have you ever been asked that if your most loved parent and your true love fell into the sea not knowing how to swim and you know you can only save one, who will you save?
Have you ever come across this point where you are rushing off on a bicycle to see a close one dying in the hospital but you come across a heavily injured and almost dying person on a deserted road?
I am deeply grieved...
Had a Vision on , 1:05 AM
:: Wronged! ::
I am deeply grieved...
Have you ever tried to do something good but in the end was wronged for another intention?
Have you tried to help an old lady pick up her keys that she dropped accidently but in the end was beaten up and chased away for theft?
Have you ever tried giving a friend some encouragement to cheer him/her up but instead was shout at in the face for being such a busy body?
Have you ever tried being a friend to others by just giving a simple smile but was accused for harassment and thought of as insane or perverted?
I am deeply grieved...
Had a Vision on , 12:47 AM
:: Field of splints ::
Let's imagine a field of splints, a kid after learning some chemistry lesson walks pass and out of curiousity uses a lighter to burn about a dozen splints, but only a few of them turned into glowing splints, some lit up but eventually turned into glowing splints, some takes quite long just to turn into glowing splints, some just wouldn't burn at all.
Then he decided to apply the science theories he learnt.
He applied the different gas like hydrogen to make the pop sound and oxygen to a few of the splints. He did a few times of the pop sound but to make the glowing splint lit up into a burning splint was abit more difficult as he needed a large amount to keep it burning.
Had a Vision on Saturday, March 29, 2008, 12:27 AM
:: Getting old... ::
One of the few greatest problem with getting old is a a bad memory... And I'm definitely there liao...
I wun 4get u today if I went out with you yesterday la... but there are times when i can just eat n 4get the next hr... there are also extreme cases where i can walk out of my room to do something n 4get why I walked out immediately when i step out of my room. serious!
One of the worst things to 4get are things I promised... especially dates thats y I keep a planner.
This is due to how easily I 4get conversations... Everything said or heard are usually just stored in my organic ram and gets erased after I shut down for the day. This has cause me some great problems I encountered recently...
People were angry/pissed/upset with me and I don't know WHY!!!
Had a Vision on Thursday, March 27, 2008, 7:37 PM
:: Final Fantasy Æ? ::
Similarities have been spotted with the games I played and the life I live in.
Squall from Final Fantasy 8 attends a school called Balamb Garden, a prestigious military academy for elite mercenaries known as "SeeDs" Takes test and goes for life threatening missions Eventually graduates and attends his SeeD graduation ball Has a bloodtype of AB+ Can draw magic and guardian forces to aid him in battle Never explains his feelings, "lone wolf" Known to be stoic in some situations Has a limit break called Renzokuken Worries too much about how others think of him
Ah Fu from Final Fantasy Æ attends Officer Cadet School, the best military leadership school in Singapore for Officers to be Takes many different test and goes for real missions Would commission eventually and attend a comms ball Has a bloodtype of AB+ Can draw cartoon and exotic art to aid him in wooing girls Tends to keep everything to himself, a "bohemian" Said to be calm, gentle and patient in some situations Has a limit to how much he Ken3 Ren3 Worries alot about how others say of him
The question is, will he meet the love of his life at comms ball like how Squall met Rinoa and embark on an adventure of a lifetime!
Had a Vision on , 4:51 PM
:: I believe in dreams ::
I believe in dreams and not wasting time
I express my feelings in poems and rhymes
Few things I'd say during the course of the day
And some things I do may have a meaning or two
But everything I write has definitely been thought deeply through the night
So do not judge what you see badly of me But change your angle and perspective
My words are critical, honest and true My actions will only be directed to you Else my name isn't Andrew Wai Sau Fu
Had a Vision on Wednesday, March 26, 2008, 11:38 PM
:: Æ is not just an alias ::
From wiki: George William Russell used a pseudonym AE, or more properly, Æ. This derived from an earlier Æ'on signifying the lifelong quest of man, subsequently shortened.
The word aeon, also spelled eon or æon, means "age", "forever" or "for eternity"
&
Æ (minuscule: æ) is a grapheme formed from the letters a and e.
As a letter of the Old English alphabet, it was called æsc ‘ash tree' after the Anglo-Saxon Futhorc rune ᚫ which it transliterated; its traditional name in English is still ash (IPA: /æʃ/).
So basically, Æ Dream in layman's term just means...
A Chimera's Lifelong Quest For The Ash Tree
Chimera's definition is a Dream; an illusion In mythology, is a monstrous creature which was made of the parts of multiple animals. or genetically speaking,
The chimera is formed from the merger of two fraternal twins in a very early (zygote or blastocyst) phase. Chimera may have a liver composed of cells with one set of chromosomes and have a kidney composed of cells with a second set of chromosomes. Most will go through life without realizing they are chimeras. The difference in phenotypes may be minute, or completely undetectable (eg: having a hitchhiker's thumb and a straight thumb, eyes of slightly different colors, differential hair growth on opposite sides of the body, etc).
I'm the few who knows I'm a chimera whose currently in an aging forest searching for a particular tree called the ash tree.
It's leaves are mostly pinnately-compound. The seeds, popularly known as keys, are a type of fruit known as a samara.
The seed can be in the centre of the wing, as in the elms (genus Ulmus) and the hoptree (Ptelea trifoliata). The seed can be on one side, with the wing extending to the other side, making the seed spiral as it falls, as in the maples (genus Acer) and ashes (genus Fraxinus). A samara is sometimes called a key and is often referred to as a helicopter or whirligig or a polynose.
So you see, everything is linked... me having identity crisis cos of my genes me being in a wing and not a company me being so into dreams cos I am one me feeling lost cos this is no place for a chimera me relating to the elements so much me having different thumbs me having wierd hair growth on my legs when both my parent don't have me having different position of ears me having extra nipples me looking for the key to my heart me feeling out of place cos I'm one of the minority me realising my difference and finding out why my strong interest for the unknown and impossible my easily rejected unorthodox ideas in this conventional world my ability to see from many perspective
I simply just don't belong here...
ok... that was crap... Æ Dream just means Forever Dreaming.
Had a Vision on Sunday, March 23, 2008, 8:26 PM
:: 5 years plan ::
my benchmarks are,
2008 Sept Dec 13 (22) Commission as an Honourable Gentleman and Officer Make a New Blog Template
2009 Sept 15, Dec 31 (23) ORD as a Respected Full Lieutenant with a Savings of at Least $11k Acquired Class 3 Driving License Dancing in Studio Wu & O School (learning) Make a portfolio
2010 Jan 30, July 21, Dec 25 (24) Dancing almost Every Other Day & Night with B-Boys in Esplanade Enrolled into a School for Part-time Diploma in Dance Choreographed a Dance for Christmas
2011 Jan 30, July 13, Sept 11 (25)
Start Dancing Career
In the Process of Getting Attached End of Solitude
2012 Jan 30, Feb 14 (26) Void Filled Start planning for Next 5 Years
Had a Vision on , 8:21 PM
:: I miss dancing ::
Watched Step Up II last week and I pictured myself dancing as I watched the movie and realise there are so many muscles I've not been using for so long. I'm starting to fear I'd lose my skill to dance, my bones get stiffer everyday.
Something has definitely got to be done!!
Had a Vision on , 8:16 PM
:: True Friend ::
One of my homework in OCS was to define what a true friend is
I wrote that a true friend is some1 who is honest in both encouragement and criticism.
I only wrote 1 line cos I had no time... now i'll write a better one...
They're the ones who will share both your joy and sorrow. They're the ones who will come when you call upon them no matter rain nor shine. They're the ones who listen to your talk and talk when you are listening. They're the ones who remembers all the impt dates you have in your calender. They're the ones who would jump in front of a bullet for you. They're the ones who constantly reminds you of your dreams, vision and goals. They're the ones who reach out their hands when you fall. They're the ones who already knows what you want before you ask for it. They're the ones who would do alot and speak little. They're the ones who would accept and appreciate you for who you really are. They're the ones who understands you. They're the ones who would kill themself if they break a promise. They're the ones who would say sorry first. They're the ones who would ride the same boat under a storm. They're the ones who would give up their needs for yours. They're the ones who would lend a shoulder to cry on.
Basically, you'll know who they are in times of need, cos they're the only ones left.
Had a Vision on , 2:26 AM
:: BSB - Trouble Is ::
How come you never know what you got Until it’s gone Too bad Cause I never felt so good with anyone How fooled was I into thinking I was gonna be alright Okay Fine
Bridge: So every day I try a little harder to forget her Lie here convince myself tomorrow will be better
Chorus: The trouble is I can’t get her out of my mind when I close my eyes at night Whos gonna save me Now she’s gone (yeah) The trouble is there’s a part of me that still can’t let go of her memory And now I know what it is Love is what the trouble is (Ohh it’s what the trouble is..)
How come she said you never wear your heart Where I can see Too bad Cause now I’m the one who’s sorry How stupid was I into thinking I was gonna be alright Okay Fine
Bridge: So every day I find a little something to remind me No matter how I try, I can’t put the past behind me
Chorus: The trouble is I can’t get her out of my mind when I close my eyes at night Whos gonna save me, now shes gone (yeah) The trouble is there’s a part of me that still can’t let go of her memory Now I know what it is love, is it in me? love me
I’m alright, I’m okay, I’ll be fine, give it time But the only..
Chorus: Trouble is I can’t get her out of my mind when I close my eyes at night (ohh no no) Whos gonna save me, now shes gone (now she’s gone) The trouble is there’s a part of me that still can’t let go of her memory (I just can’t) And now I know what it is… (yes I know) now I know what it is cause love is what the trouble is (the trouble is) Love is what the trouble is. (heyy heyy)
Had a Vision on Saturday, March 22, 2008, 5:32 PM
:: Butterflies in the stomach ::
I cleared my extras early so i can have a longer weekend this week n next week so i could see her them. She didn't come.Good friday event continued, all was well until the end when shethey appeared... I had no idea how those butterflies got into my stomach... but they were really something scary to have...
My heart skipped a beat den suddenly it accelerated... My heart sank like titanic My limbs became weak My guts vanished My muscles couldn't work My hands shivered like a rattle snake My tongue tied up into a ribbon My breathing became heavier My ears could no longer hear My brain went dead My mine went blank My vision became dark Everyone else disappeared
Only a smile appeared...
Had a Vision on , 11:46 AM
:: Good Friday event ::
Yesterday's good friday was a success.
But can be improved... My game could have been more fun, 2 teams could be used instead of 3 it could be a bigger space rather den 2 steps reach le it could be explained more properly with more preparation a proper point system could have helped too a better identification of the cats would be better too bible verses attached to the punishment would be better also a more clear example of each punishment would have a bigger impact also the atmosphere could be improved with better lights n sound control A much better AAR could have been made if I had planned what to say
The invitation card could have been made more attractive maybe a poster would help n pasted months before the event the card could have been made into something that can hang on the bag t-shirts/slip-on costume could be made for the event as well decorations could have improved the ambience as well maybe paint the walls with BLOOD!
Mocktails can definitely be improved in terms of taste, appearance and presentation a proper kitchen could be provided proper tools could be provided
AHHH!!! too much to say le... If only I was more free!!! I want my freedom!!!
Had a Vision on , 10:30 AM
:: Why give up a forest for a tree? ::
Don't give up a forest because a single tree...
There are so many other different trees out there...
Why this tree?
Well, what if I say I don't know... What if I say I was just walking through the forest, then I came upon this open patch and in the center of this open patch there is a stump then behide this stump, there's a little tree, still growing it's leaves were different from that of the other trees it still bore no fruits as it was too young but it's beautiful golden leaves made me curious why this little tree was here and what fruits it can produce the other hunters have moved forward for the bigger trees another group is coming from behind and eventually some will pass by this open patch to see this young and exotic tree and they might chop it down
If knowing this, yet I do not protect this tree and keep it for myself how then can I forgive myself, how then will I ever know what fruits it can bare, what if this was the tree I was looking for?
So I decided to put up warning signs around the area and wait...
BUT apparently I've alarmed the owners and the farmers of this tree...
The farmers are stopping me from getting anywhere near the tree now...
My hunter frens are making fun of me, saying how foolish I am to wait for something that might not be worth the wait... They kept asking if I was sure but haven't the measures I took already says it all? Are not actions bigger than words??!!
Now I see their true colors... I don't really know if they are my frens anymore... But it doesn't matter anymore... I'm really going insane... I should be put away in an asylum..
My friends, if you are still my friends pls provide me a room in the asylum near the tree, give me a bed to sleep, food to eat, and water to drink, don't give me a computer else I'll start to write nonsense again...
Had a Vision on , 9:32 AM
:: Ultimate Criminal ::
I've been reflecting on myself and what I've done in OCS...
Apparently, from the title it says I've not really been a good boy. These 2 words actually came out from the mouth of another, a christian as a matter of fact.
I don't fill up my water bottle when everyone else does then I take my buddy's for the spot check I stole someone elses overlay when in need but returned after using another piece I found somewhere else I copy homework I ask for answer during test I bring camera phone when it's not allowed I hide when they need voluteer to do the extra mile I eat in the bunk when it's not allowed I still continue to bring sweets around when they no longer allow I leave my dirty in my bunk when it's not allowed I sleep when everyone else is cleaning their rifle
I am truly an Ultimate Criminal
Had a Vision on , 8:27 AM
:: A Future Fogged by Accident ::
Now, it seems it's more about honor... but am I really bringing honor to them? Or to myself? Am I doing this for myself, God, my parents or others? Or everyone? Is it something I should be proud of? Or should I even be proud at all? I keep having hints of me falling from pride... and apparently, I've already fallen... from the low ramp of SOC into a cloudy crossway junction...
Should I OOC to recourse to rest up to recover my injured heel to redeem myself to have more time for Godand for others to get another chance to get the sword of merit from the JC batches to really bring honor to my parents and glory to God but sacrificing about a total of $1500 which comes from retaining 3 extra months in OCS when I could have been an officer earlier but instead I become a private/corporal for the upcoming 3 months and also the chance to commission together with YT?
OR
Should I rely on God's strength over my weakness andbelieve in a miracle that may or may not happen and continue pushing on, enduring the pain, and taking the risk of permanently damaging my heel and sole, possiblysacrificing my future to dance for the LORD all for the sake of bringing another type of glory to Godaltogether?
Ok, let's compare the choices...
Both would bring Glory to God Both involves very big sacrifices
The cloudy part is if I should give up Money for time... time for God, time for others and time for myself A honorable glory from the sword of merit that may not happen A future glory as a dance instructor that also might not happen OR Time for money... money for God, money for others and money for myself A miraculous glory that might gain me a testimonial for life A future glory that I might save souls due to my faith in God
Had a Vision on , 7:49 AM
:: I want to baptize but... ::
He said, "Don't get bound by them... Go and find a girlfriend then say..."
So now I remember why he wouldn't let me... it wasn't about me not grown up and unable to think for myself... so why do I want to commission as an officer? Wasn't it to prove to them I've grown up so I can finally baptize?
Ok, nvm... The thing is I want to baptize and the problem is my father don't let me because he doesn't want me to have a religion problem in the future with my future spouse so he wants to see my girlfriend, assure her religion and our potential to get married before he lets me make the decision...
Now comes the real problem... Yup! I need a christian girlfriend; a potential wife to be
But then again, is delaying my baptism a problem?
Isn't waiting a part of my life already...
Had a Vision on , 12:23 AM
:: BSB - Unmistakable ::
Finally, it's done... You must be wondering who is this WildGirl...
I just hope she's Unmistakable...
Anytime, anywhere, any place You could be anyone today Maybe I will recognize you on a crowded street
Maybe you'll take me by surprise Will you be the one I had in mind?
Chorus There'll come a day When you'll walk out of my dreams Face to face Like I'm imagining Baby how can I be sure That you're the one I'm waiting for Will you be Unmistakable?
People say we're watching our lives
Through a glass Desperately waiting on a chance I know you're out there Holding on Holding out for me
Are we gonna know the time is right What if you're here and I'm just blind
Chorus There'll come a day When you'll walk out of my dreams Face to face Like I'm imagining Baby how can I be sure That you're the one I'm waiting for Will you be Unmistakable?
How can I know a song I never heard How will I know your voice When you haven't said a word
How do I know how this will end Before we begin Before we begin
There'll come a day When you walk out of my dreams Face to face (face to face) Like I'm imagining (Like I'm imagining) Baby, how can I be sure (how can I be sure) That you're the one I'm waiting for (You're the one I'm waiting for) Will you be (will you be) Will you be (will you be) Unmistakable Unmistakable
Had a Vision on Monday, March 10, 2008, 1:47 AM
:: Identity Crisis - Part II ::
Who am I?
Everytime we gather at some point in a big group and If there's a sharing session, the things I get are just so contradicting... some will say he's quiet... some say noisy... some say i'm reserved, some say I'm expressive, some say i'm lazy, some say i'm dilligent, some say i'm patient, some say i'm impatient, some say this some say that and usually they're opposites...
Apparently, this is due to because of the diff way I deal with diff ppl for I believe every1 is diff and every1 needs a diff approach concerning diff matters...
I'm like a water or air with no definite shape... only changing to whatever shape my container is...
This is dangerous as it will be hard for people to know the real me... hard for me too...
So who am I?
Had a Vision on , 12:55 AM
:: Spiritual Stability ::
I wanted to blog this 1-2 weeks ago but apparently time didn't allow me to...
Now, what exactly is Spiritual Stability?
The questions used to determined if one is stable were, do you always attend cell? Do you always attend service? Do you always pray? Do you maintain your time with God reading His words?
If you ask me, I don't know if I am stable or not... I pray everyday, I don't read His words everyday but when I do, I read with my heart... I never miss cell groups though recently my extra duties are breaking my record and momentum, I will try to come even if I come just to say 'amen'. Same goes for service... but somehow recently i felt like i'm coming for the wrong reasons... the person I came to see doesn't seem to be 100% God which is NOT a good thing...
So am I Spiritually Stable or not? Somebody tell me please... and if not, what should I do? What can I do!?
Had a Vision on , 12:34 AM
:: Overgrowth ::
They say too much of something is not good for the body...
Does it apply to growth?
Is there such a thing as overgrowth?
They say you should constantly improve urself, to bare fruits, to grow... but when i was reading Ecclesiastes 1:18 says "For with much wisdom comes much sorrow; the more knowledge, the more grief."
Yet it's impt to have wisdom and knowledge but too much seems to have a negative effect... sorrow and grief comes to visits whenever my mind is free nowadays...
God, have I overgrown? How then can I fix this? For sorrow and grief is not a favourable feeling to carry around... pls stay with me and fill me up with love, joy and peace...
Had a Vision on , 12:01 AM
:: The worst is gone ::
YES! Platoon field camp finish le... fire trench is owned, blown away by my GentleSquall's hurricane, and extinguished by CryptoCloud's pouring rain!!
The final 4 weeks of service term shouldn't be any prob liao... OCCT, SOC, SEOC and RM left...
phew... now i just wanna finish my last extra so I can finally be
"FREE!!!"
Had a Vision on Sunday, March 02, 2008, 6:00 PM
: |Wishlist| :
White Tuxedo
Degree Graduate
Pilot Dream
Start setting good examples
Develop Positive Thinking (Accept only the good and positive)
Spread Positive Thinking (Give only the good and positive)
Take a genuine interest in people and care for them
Millionaire by age 33
Feed thousands in the 3rd world countries
Someone who can inspire people