Fai†hfully Preparing my Fields for the Rain

:: Like a mouse in a maze ::

Dear God,
I feel like I'm running and running, surging my brain but I just can't find the right path to take.. Alot happened today, I received my tactics test 2 results only to find that I scored 2nd highest to an officer-on-course in the platoon and this sort of striked me, boost up my confidence quite abit thinking that there's still a glimpse of hope, I happily continued working on comms ball and settled quite a few stuff thinking I'm going to be out of the maze until suddenly I peeped out my head and see a path out of nowhere!

I was told that there's a chance to recourse without extending my ORD meaning I'll join halfway thru pro term, means I have to go thailand, some other serious shit, means i have to go thru that last leg again.. I really dunno I should... I know it doesn't really matter after NS but..

Then before I've figured out my thoughts, the comms ball committee comes back and throw a big cheese over my head and now I'm in a big mess and time is running out...

God, I need a bigger sign... I've sinned, and now I'm blind, forgive me and heal eyes so I can see the path you have set for me clearly and walk on it.
In Jesus Christ Precious name, amen.

Had a Vision
on Wednesday, November 19, 2008, 4:52 PM

:: New Characters ::

Today I created new characters to accompany GentleSquall, CryptoCloud and AphoticDream...

Details will be coming soon...

btw, I'm also coming back...

Had a Vision
on Tuesday, November 18, 2008, 9:54 PM

:: Not all bunnies are cute ::

Today was going rather ok until I saw one of the most unsightful thing from one of God's most cutest creations...

She ticked me off with one of the coldest way..

Dear God,
Forgive me for ever having the thought of leaving the church. I believe You will make a way for me. This is the second time I feel unwelcomed by the church because of my sis. Just because she's different, imature and has the mind of a child doesn't mean she should be put aside, shoved off or cast away.

"Whoever welcomes one of these little children in my name welcomes me; and whoever welcomes me does not welcome me but the one who sent me."
Mark 9:37

People were bringing little children to Jesus to have him touch them, but the disciples rebuked them. When Jesus saw this, he was indignant. He said to them, "Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these. I tell you the truth, anyone who will not receive the kingdom of God like a little child will never enter it." And he took the children in his arms, put his hands on them and blessed them.
Mark 10:13-16

I know it's my responsibility to take care of her and it's wrong to just leave her in church and letting her become a burden to others but right now I really need the church to be a little more understanding and patient with me until I get these camo color chains off my limbs. Then once again, I can dance for Jesus.

Thank you God for teaching me that things aren't what they may seem to be.

In Jesus Christ most precious name, amen.

Had a Vision
on Sunday, November 16, 2008, 9:39 PM

:: Another Crossroad ::

Dear God,
I have reach another crossroad in life. It seems like the same one I had 9 months ago when I had to choose to between getting out of course or recourse due to injury and now it's due to performance and the stakes are higher. If I choose to recourse getting another shot at pride and bringing home honor but at the price of 3 months extention to my ORD and a waste of time to go thru the same 6 months of brutal shit. The other choice is I give up pride, honor and accept the fact that I suck but live a happy, positive, carefree life where I get to be myself and not forced be someone I'm not.

The choice is obvious but a part of me just dun wanna be defeated like this.

Today You talked to me I think..
You told me not to be bothered by what others think of me..
You told me to be myself because trying to be someone I'm not will only bring unhappiness..
You told me that if people say I'm shit, they're right cos they're also the same cos we were all made the same way..

God, I know this is the real test.. The test where you let me decide whether to throw away that big piece of pride lying in front of me.. to throw away the chance to dress smartly, to march proudly, to announce to the world how proud I am to commission as an officer..

Give me strength God, for this decision is not easy to make. In Jesus Precious name, Amen.

Had a Vision
on Sunday, November 09, 2008, 3:34 PM

:: Why did my plan fail? ::

I wrote down my plan...

and I thought it was a good plan...

Until it backfired...

And now I'm torn...

Had a Vision
on , 2:48 PM

:: Remy Zero - Save Me ::

I feel my wings have broken
In your hands
I feel the words unspoken
Inside
When they pull you under
And I would give you any thing you want
You were all I wanted
All my dreams are falling down
Crawling round and round and round

Somebody save me
Let your waters break right through
Somebody save me
I don't care how you do it
Just save, save
Come on
I've been waiting for you

I see the world has folded in your heart
I feel the waves crash down inside
And they pull me under
And I would give you anything you want
You were all I wanted
All my dreams have fallen down
Crawling round and round and round

Somebody save me
Let your waters break right through
Somebody save me
I don't care how you do it
Just save, save
Come on
I've been waiting for you

All my dreams are on the ground
Crawling' round and round and round

Somebody save me
Let your waters break right through
Somebody save me
I don't' care how you do it
Just save me, save me
I've made this whole world shine for you
Just save, save
Come on
I'm still waiting for you

Had a Vision
on Sunday, November 02, 2008, 3:16 PM

:: Feeling Helpless ::

Dear God,

I feel like I'm drowning and nobody's there to give me a hand. Unexpected currents are pushing me around like nobody's business, sweeping me further and further away, to where I do not know. It's dark under water, I cannot see anything. Everybody on the shore are just doing their own stuff and don't seem to notice me and for those who see me seems like they are just there looking and pointing at me while I try my best to gasp for air. I'm crying for help but my tears are swept away and voice covered by the clashing of waves.

Had a Vision
on , 2:26 PM

:: movie with mom ::

I went out with my mom yesterday and I learnt that it's not a good idea to watch movie with her... she talks in the show...

Had a Vision
on , 2:17 PM

:: My new love ::

2008 Automobile of the Year
Audi R8

Had a Vision
on Saturday, November 01, 2008, 9:54 PM