Fai†hfully Preparing my Fields for the Rain

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:: Passion and Purpose dilemma ::

Ok, I'm facing some problem. Lack of time and money.

I need time to work on my internet business, I need time and money to pursue my pilot dream.

Gonna verbalize my thoughts and plans.
$150 to $200 for Medical Checkup
$3100 for subscribing to Singapore Flying Club to get Restricted Private Pilot Licence.
S$20,000 to 30,000 to actually getting the actual Private Pilot Licence (PPL).
$300 to get a Powered Pleasure Craft Driving License (PPCDL) to increase my chance to becoming a pilot.
$500 + $500 to get a Basic Scuba Diving License, then an Advanced Scuba Diving License also to increase my chance to becoming a pilot.

25 now, still got 1 yr b4 i get my bachelors in Multimedia Game Design. So meanwhile I can get a job with at least S$1.7k to sustain the temporary cash setback.

26, I'll go Australia to work as a programmer for an average of AU$43K while I use the night time to get my online business going.

27, If my online business goes well, stop working and go for pilot course in either SG for the cost above or in Aussie for AU$42K if I find one that accepts foreign students.

28, look for real estates to acquire, start building cashflow to get my dream house (castle) in Waimea Bay, Hawaii. This is also when I start finding a tree to chop in the forest, missed the flower already.

Next problem, Lack of Passion and Purpose.
I was put into a suspension for my current job and they have this 'acres of diamond' to supposedly motivate us, but it didn't work however I realize these 2 factors have been missing in my life recently.

I'm stuck doing this job which I don't really like. I want to stay cos of the benefit of receiving income without having to do much which gives me time to take on other jobs that can give me money too. But it's not sustainable, cos eventually I still need to do something (prospecting for clients). On the other hand, if I stop doing this job, and do a 8 to 5 job. I may lose my flexible time but I can solve most of my immediate money problems.

So I'm gonna do some research on what Passion and Purpose is.

Passion
If you won the lottery next week would you quit your job? If you would, what is that saying?

Those who love their job are usually tempted to even do for free! Even if they won the biggest lottery, they would still continue to work. This is called passion. (think I just found mine... re-found actually... some asshole destroyed it when I was much younger.)

Purpose
Purpose is something else, probably something spiritual. Something that we may know when the time is right. We need not seek God's purpose for us for He will reveal to us when we are ready. We do however need to seek God.

To elaborate why, say if I take Jesus for example, His purpose was to die... for us. But why didn't He die when He was 15 or He could have waited until 70. Did He not know His purpose when he was younger? For Joseph, he had a dream that his brothers will bow down to him since young, and it really did happened later in his life, but did he know how it was going to happen or was he very sure that it will happen? For Moses, he didn't know he had to lead the people out of Egypt till he was pretty late in his years, did he seek for his purpose since young?

Proverbs 19:21 says,
"Many are the plans in a person’s heart, but it is the LORD’s purpose that prevails."

Tells us that no matter what choice we make in life, it does not overwrite God's purpose for us.

Like how many bible characters were later lead to another path by God through various means. Like how Paul's path were blocked, like how Jonah was swallowed by the big fish.

So my point is, if we are stuck in a crossroad, we just need to pray that God is with us in whatever path we take, even if it's the wrong one.

Genesis 39:23 talks about Joseph,
"The warden paid no attention to anything under Joseph’s care, because the LORD was with Joseph and gave him success in whatever he did."

It didn't matter what Joseph was doing, he was successful not because he had many talents or stuff like that, but because the LORD was with him and it was the LORD that gave him success.

Ok, that clears purpose. And it doesn't really clashes with passion. So coming back to passion. Do we need to do something we are passionate in when the important thing is to seek God?

Hmmm.... need to start praying.

Dear God, I've decided to take this path like so and so. To pursue my dream as a pilot. To attain financial freedom for the glory of God. To build Waisofun Castle for my offsprings. All this are my hopes, dreams, goals and plans, God. All this may or may not lead to what You, my Creator, wants me to do ultimately. I understand the ball is once again in my court and you've given me the freewill to do what I want and so I've decided, I pray that You will lead me, guide me and bless me along this path that I've chosen and ultimately lead me to what You want me to do, LORD. Forgive my selfish desires, grant me a humble heart that desires You. In Jesus, most Holy and Precious Name I pray, amen.

Had a Vision
on Thursday, February 24, 2011, 8:57 PM

:: Fact vs Truth (girlfriend dilemma) ::

I've been praying and waiting for the green light for so long and finally it has light up but I'm no longer sure if I want to cross the road anymore cos right after this traffic light, I'll be hitting the corner of a building and there I have to choose between 2 paths. Both will lead to the same destination but once I've chosen the path, there's no going back cos it's gonna be a really long way...

All the facts tell me I don't have to worry which paths I take so I really don't need to worry. But is it the truth?

I tell myself I don't really need to worry about my future. I can survive on my own, I did it in army, my most down and worst moment of my live, in the jungle for 9 days. I lived through it, alone! I can find my own food, make my own house, and stay alive in the rain for 9 days, alone! (alone! means without a girlfriend. My comrades were with me no doubt.)

I don't need a wife/girlfriend to walk this path, why would I need one for?

After acquiring financial intelligence, I have concluded that a girlfriend is a liability and sometimes also seen as a long term investment with non-guaranteed returns. If beauty is their only benefit and wants to get married, it is also known as a depreciating asset with a risk of losing half the investor's assets. In any successful businessman's eyes, they are definitely not worth the time or money... but I don't belong to the world therefore I shouldn't think like the world.

So I went to seek for help... Since 5 years ago, I read "I Kissed Dating Goodbye" and "Boy Meets Girl" by Joshua Harris along with other sources from the web and other advisors, I understand the purpose of getting a girlfriend is because I have decided to work towards marrying her eventually and not go dating to try and to see if we can work out or not, whereas for courtship, unlike dating, will begin with her parents knowing that I want to protect her spiritually first, followed by supporting her emotionally and finally provide for her physically in every way I can, morally. Ultimately, to achieve a better relationship with God as a couple.

Other reasons for not getting one are as follows.
In Maslow's hierarchy of needs, I realize I can fulfill all the required needs, alone!

I don't need to worry about eating good food cos I can make my own honey omelette breakfast, cook my own wafu pasta for lunch, bake my own cheesecakes for my own birthdays and blend myself a nice mango smoothie before I go to sleep.

I don't need to worry about my cleanliness cos I can wash my dirty toilet, clean my own smelly underwear, dry my own towels, and iron my own uniforms. I will be learning how to sew my own clothes in the near future.

I don't need to worry my financial future cos I've got enough talents to find my own job, career and possibly start my own business to fund enough for my needs and wants and not to mention the financial IQ to plan a good future. My parents are probably going to leave the car and house to me cos i'm the only son, my dad has 2 piece of land that has a value enough for my grandchildren even if I choose not to work.

I don't need to worry about loneliness cos I can get a puppy dog, cat, bunny or even a parrot if I wanted a companion to talk and play with. I understand the technological advances well enough to know that I can talk to anyone about anything through virtual worlds like Second Life, MMORPG, IMVU chats or simply strangers on Facebook if I needed a person to share my secrets with cos they have no idea who am I so they can't really spread to people who knows me.

I don't need to worry about happiness cos I'm a funny guy, so funny that I make myself laugh about anything at all. Just need to take a scroll outside and I'll be thinking how funny it is to see a lady in her late 40s still trying her best to look pretty but has no idea why she's still single. If not, I can also download funny clips or movies online to watch anyway.

I don't need to worry about my offspring cos my dad says he'll buy me a wife if I don't find a girlfriend by 30. I'd have done the same and I'm sure I'll choose the one with the best possible genetics in terms of physical appearance to match my intellectual, healthy, tall and strong genetics to get the best possible genetically produced children. Sorry to boast but there's only about 3% in the world's population who has AB blood type which makes me pretty rare among the A, B and O blood type.

I don't need to worry about how my children will grow up to be cos I have developed a habit of actively looking out for self-help books and articles via the internet to constantly upgrade myself emotionally, spiritually and in terms of relationship. I can build a loving relationship with anybody I want if I wanted. I am also confident to teach, train and bring up newborns to become the best that they can be all on my own.

My only worry is my sis and my parents when they get older as I move on in life but I'm sure I can come to a compromising solution with my mei who will move out to live with her husband in the future.

So I don't really have a good enough reason to be looking for a girlfriend right now but tell me why is there a very sharp piercing feeling inside when I think about this? Is there really someone out there specially made for me that I must pursue in this life? Did I miss out something here?

I try to seek the bible for help and I'm faced with a
'The LORD God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.”' -Genesis 2:18
and
"Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor:"
-Ecclesiastes 4:9
followed by a
"Are you pledged to a woman? Do not seek to be released. Are you free from such a commitment? Do not look for a wife. But if you do marry, you have not sinned; and if a virgin marries, she has not sinned. But those who marry will face many troubles in this life, and I want to spare you this." -1 Corinthians 7:27-28

I was stuck in this dilemma for quite some time now and I kept on praying really hard about it and God finally told me that it doesn't matter which one I choose for He Will reveal to me His purpose for me in either choice I make. The ball comes back right into my court once again. I'm still stuck in this dilemma. Sigh...

Feel like tossing a coin and leaving to fate.

Which leads me to the second part, Passion and Purpose... To Be Continued...

Had a Vision
on Wednesday, February 23, 2011, 10:56 PM

:: Researching Dream ::

Maturity curve graph

I dreamt that I was researching on this studies about how boys and girls mature differently at different life stages.

First I saw an image of me explaining about primary-sec sch when the girls are already in young adult while the boys are still in teen

then I saw another image of the boys in army uniform. They were growing beyond adulthood while the university class of females were still in their young adulthood.

Had a Vision
on Monday, February 21, 2011, 7:38 AM

:: Random Poem ::

Was researching on my name and it's origin

and found out that my ancestor was a military leader

Not only was he good at strategy, tactics and farming

He was also good at writing great poetry later

I thought I was weird that kept writing in rhymes

So I stopped one day, I wanted to fit in

But now I know I wasn't wasting my time

I was made to be special from the very beginning

I will continue to be myself, just the way I am

I won't care what people may say or think

Who made them king or queen of anything

Had a Vision
on Friday, February 18, 2011, 8:50 PM

:: Facebook Status: Fruits ::

Everyday I've been eating fruits cos my dad's a semi farmer. He'll either make honey orange juice, coconut milk, cut apples, custard apples, durians, jackfruits, banana, longan, rambutan, or mangoes.

Everything gets kind of voided cos my mom cooks the meat-base meals in 1 inch thick oil.

I like mangoes the best but recently I found myself eating strawberries.

Next up, there was also something going on with facebook status which I didn't show mine cos there was one that really describes my status now.

If I were to write down my real status it would go like this:

Single, available but not actively seeking one but don't mind going into one if someone suitable comes along. Wants to focus on studies, career and business which I am not really focused on. Got my eyes on someone but not sure about the target.

Had a Vision
on Thursday, February 17, 2011, 4:13 PM

:: History of my surname. 韦 (韋) wéi ::

Han Xin (died 196 BC) was a military general who served Liu Bang (Emperor Gaozu of Han) during the Chu–Han contention period and contributed greatly to the founding of the Han Dynasty. Han was named as one of the "Three Heroes of the early Han Dynasty" (漢初三傑), along with Zhang Liang and Xiao He.
Han is best remembered as a brilliant military leader for the strategies and tactics he employed in warfare, some of which became the origins of certain Chinese idioms. In recognition of Han's contributions, Liu conferred the titles of "King of Qi" on him in 203 BC and "King of Chu" in the following year. However, Liu was afraid of Han's abilities and gradually reduced Han's military power, demoting him to "Marquis of Huaiyin" in late 202 BC. In 196 BC, Han was accused of participating in a rebellion and lured into a trap and executed on Empress Lü Zhi's orders.

Descendants

Despite his role in Han's death, Xiao He tried to prevent Han's family from being completely killed. He asked Kuai Tong to help Han's two sons escape to Nanyue and change their family name to Zhuo (卓) and Wei (韋) to conceal their identities. One of Han's relatives hid in wheat during the massacre and changed his family name to Mai (麥), which means "wheat".[3]

Later the Wai family, being the largest family in Tai Wai village, where the name of the area came from, was the largest and oldest walled village in Sha Tin. It was built in 1574 during the Ming Dynasty, and was called Chik Chuen Wai (Chinese: 積存圍) at the time. It was originally made up of 16 families, Wai (韋), Chan (陳), Ng (吳), Yeung (楊), Wong (黃), Lee (李), Hui (許), Cheng (鄭), Tong (唐), Yuen (袁), Yau (游), Lam( 林), Lok (駱), Tam (譚), Mok (莫) and Choy (蔡).

Sprouting from traditional Chinese farming villages growing rice, Tai Wai area once functioned as a light suburban industrial park in the 1970s. Few factory buildings are still in use, mostly as warehouses. The current urbanization of the area is the consequence of the development of Sha Tin New Town.

So basically, I'm not of Royal Blood, just a Hero's Blood. A brilliant military leader with exceptional skills in warfare strategies and tactics, demoted to a Marquis then executed for being accused of rebellion and lured into a trap just because the emperor was afraid. Then concealing my identity by becoming a farmer growing rice and making lots of babies.

No wonder I was so good at strategy games and how I could actually be acing the tactics test in OCS. How I felt so misplaced, misunderstood and accused for nothing. How I actually didn't commission and got demoted to a sergeant, how my grandfather was a farmer from china, how he had 12 babies, and how I actually wants 7 children.

Had a Vision
on Monday, February 14, 2011, 11:58 PM

:: DreamBoard Done!!! ::

I'm feeling the pain already. Breaking off procrastination, and finally made my DreamBoard! My main goal is to get a passive income of 1mil/month via acquiring assets and businesses so I can buy a piece of land next to Waimea Bay, Hawaii and build a Castle of complete fun and learning, naming it after myself, the WAISOFUN CASTLE!

Other doodads include a Private Jet, Helicopter, Ferrari 360 Spider, Super Yacht, Exotic White Animals as Pets, Servants, Maids, Bodyguards, Chauffeur, and Business Managers, Personal Chefs, and finally some of the Extreme Sports that I've always wanted to do like Jet Skiing, Wing-Suit Flying and Hang Gliding!

Now I need to wrap it with plastic else it's gonna rot away cos this goal is gonna take me at least a few years to reach.

God pls help me. I promise to give only the Castle to my descendants, and the rest of my estates to multiple Charity Organisations when I die. Thx in advance. In Jesus most Holy name I pray, amen.

Had a Vision
on , 1:57 AM

:: 我高舉雙手 ::

我攤開我的雙手.

想要給你什麼.卻一無所有.

我獻上我的身體.

想要報答你什麼.

可是卻虧欠你那麼多.

主你卻用你溫柔雙手.抬起我的頭.

輕輕對我說.你恩典夠我用.

我高舉雙手.觸摸你的手.

倒空生命.只願愛你更多.

我高舉雙手.願觸摸你的手.

定睛仰望十架.成我力量

Had a Vision
on Thursday, February 03, 2011, 11:58 AM

:: All I Have To Give ::

I did this 2 yrs ago, shall do it again...

1. Put your iTunes/Napster/Zune Player/WinAmp/etc on shuffle.
2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.
3. YOU MUST WRITE THAT SONG NAME DOWN NO MATTER HOW SILLY IT SOUNDS!

Here goes:

IF SOMEONE SAYS "IS THIS OKAY" YOU SAY?
Boston
(Yup, I dun mind going there to take a look...)

WHAT DO YOU LIKE IN A GUY/GIRL?
Girlfriend
(O.O i just need one, doesn't matter what i like bout her.)

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE'S PURPOSE?
Xing Xing Quan 心型圈 (Love in the Shape of a Heart)
(to love huh... i feel so too...)

WHAT IS YOUR MOTTO?
The One
(I'll be the One, to hold u and make sure u'll be alright.)

WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU?
That's What She Said
(Who? Said what? Am I always the last to know!! o.O)

WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT VERY OFTEN?
Ni Na Me Ai Ta 你那么爱她 (You Love Her So Much)
(Oh Shucks! Even my Windows Media Player can tell what I'm thinking about!)

WHAT IS 2+2?
Rainy Love
(Huh? Enough with the love thing already...)

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR BEST FRIEND?
Ivory Palaces
(My best friend dun live on earth.)

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
Jesus, Take The Wheel
(Take it from my hand, I can't do this on my own.)

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE STORY?
Everytime
(Everytime I close my eyes... I realize... )

WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?
Thank You Lord
(I wanna thank God when I grow up for all the blessing I cannot see.)

WHAT DO YOU THINK WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
You Are God Alone (Not A God)
(I think of God... I guess... )

WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU?
Welcome Home
(they always welcome me home... both earthly and Heavenly parents...)

WHAT WILL YOU DANCE TO AT YOUR WEDDING?
People Need The Lord
(Yes, I promise I'll glorify God's name at my Wedding.)

WHAT WILL THEY PLAY AT YOUR FUNERAL?
Above It All
(ya, a Christian song seems predictable)

WHAT IS YOUR HOBBY/INTEREST?
Dang Ni 當你 (When You)
(When you r there, nothing else really matters.)

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR FRIENDS?
Nothings Gonna Change My Love For You

(yea, I love my friends alright... dun really show it, but i really do.)

WHAT'S THE WORST THING THAT COULD HAPPEN?
Heaven Knows
(haha, yea... only Heaven knows...)

HOW WILL YOU DIE?
Hey There Delilah
(huh? U mean when I meet a person called Delilah?)

WHAT IS THE ONE THING YOU REGRET?
Never Gone
(Never saying what I feel till my chance is gone is more like it...)

WHAT MAKES YOU LAUGH?
Hear Our Cry
(wah! Sound So Evil... Hearing people cry dun make me laugh at all can.)

WHAT MAKES YOU CRY?

Stars Are Blind
(When cupid is blind... shoot me but never shoot the other person... )

WILL YOU EVER GET MARRIED?
Fallin For You
(Of cos we must fall in love b4 we get married like DUH!! =P)

WHAT SCARES YOU THE MOST?
Breakaway
(When I take a chance, make a change, breakaway and fly too high...)

DOES ANYONE LIKE YOU?
We All Need
(We all need someone to like us, I'm not sure who but I know God sure likes me! =D)

IF YOU COULD GO BACK IN TIME, WHAT WOULD YOU CHANGE?
One Love
(Change One Love?? I dun get it...)

WHAT HURTS RIGHT NOW?
Try
(trying hurts i guess..)

WHAT WILL YOU POST THIS AS?
All I have To Give
(ok loh. -_-)

Had a Vision
on , 1:10 AM