Fai†hfully Preparing my Fields for the Rain

:: Stupid World! I hate U! ::

I hate u world! i was thinking... i mean seriously thinking... all i've been thinking is DotA, Maple, game, ect. But just now i was really thinking.. Why?! y do people have to be so selfish? y all they ever think abt is how is this food or drink or game going to satisfy "ME" or even person, how r "they" going to please "ME"!! Why is this game so stupid.. DotA.. Defense of the Ancients... wtf! y nobody ever create games like "Plan a way to make some1 else happy" where people think of ways to make other people happy and get points deducted for each "I, me or my" word used. Maybe this seems like crap, but i don't give a damn wat the hell "U" think "U" selfish jerks out there! this does not apply to every1 though... just the majority who's walking on the path that is wide n where every1 else walks on... i know right path is narrow, hard to walk and bloody with Christ suffering blood. So that's y so little people walk that path, cos these ppl r not only selfish, they have no balls, no guts! they r afraid of pain, suffering, they r lazy to take the long way, the more diff way.

Speaking of balls, y do so much guys i mean the majority enjoy chasing after balls just to kick it?!! or even slamming it on the ground multiple times b4 jumping up n give it a final slam to the ground. They enjoy such violence?! y? is violence so entertaining tt they much jump for joy when they see some1 kicking a ball strategicly into a big hole!? n even those guys who read books, they read book ya sure... harry potter cast a magic that turns some1 into a snake?! ever wondered y they read books? cos they want to improve "THEMSELVES"... cos "I" am bored... cos it can improve "MY" english... cos it helped "ME" to overcome "MY" fears of walking out of the comfort zone... hah!

Speaking of comfort zone, congrats to those who manage to walk out of there, congrats to those who made everything else outside the comfort zone theirs, and congrats to those who didn't cos their lifeline is nothing but a straight line with only a few bumps but they no their gonna die one day yet they dun do anything abt it... still continueing to "enjoy" the violence, lust, greed that this world offers...

sadly... i too is pulled into this evil vortex that satan has laid in front of me... All i ever think abt is, how to kill this person, how to trick him into my trap, then kill him, how to survive long enough to be strong enough to kill him. So what if i can kill him so many times, my teammate keep letting him kill.. it's a game of teamwork, the diffcult part is not killing, it's building up a strong team tt's difficult... it's as difficult as building a person, winning them over to your thinking is only possible if tt person is not so stubborn, selfish, greedy, ect. If only they are open minded, n say things like... "oh! so tt's y i keep dying. I really suck in this, teach me please." instead of "NOOooooo! no lor! you're WRONG! listen to ME! Can 1! You dun believe me!?" kaoz! tt's threatening friendship manz! for a game?! for goodness sake! I really hate u, satan... I hope Jesus take venges on U for everything u've done to the ppl in this world.

Looking back, there was once i used to be "Holy" reading the bible n stuff... I wonder wat happened... i use to read books like "I kiss dating goodbye" n i really did... but i also read many other things like "men are from mars, women are from venus", an ongoing article from a website abt how to date n sort of manipulating women to their core plus i live with women in my house, in school n even church!? most of the time at least 1:3 ratio?! n actually went over 1:20 sometimes... it was like a total practice ground for me... but i didn't do anything... i just read... k, maybe i did try some... n whether they work, the women themselves know, i dunno cos i never ask... i just enjoy making ppl laugh but i'm jealous of ppl who can make more ppl laugh... something i NEED to change.

haiz... i miss somebody... somebody.. i'm not gonna say who... only 3 person know who... God, me n tt person...

hmm... i should write another entry fast... hope nobody read this entry and start asking if i'm alrite n stuff cos it's pretty obvious, i've tone down... maybe i'm just stress... hah... yay! pizza hut this coming friday... last time i ate pizza hut was like years ago manz... but pizzas... the last time i ate i think was at somebody house... i'm not gonna say who...

somehow i don't feel like ending this entry... feels like i got alot to say...

THE END

Had a Vision
on Saturday, September 17, 2005, 10:16 PM